a raw collection of words from my heart


five reasons i am happy today

happiness is something we all want, but we don't get enough of.
here's a collection of five things that make me happy today. and that usually make me happy most days. because i want to make you smile, and be happy today, when you think about these things.

{one} i'm alive.
reminder: never ever take this for granted. waking up every morning is a gift, cliche as it might be.
+ don't just be another living creature; we have too many people "just existing" in this world.  LIVE your life, in the truest sense of the word.
+ treasure the moments that make you live, and make them happen.

{two} i have people i love.
+ Loving people is something wondrous. I honestly don't think life would be as fun, as exciting, as painful, as crazy without love.
+ Love is a splash of colour into life.
+ Funny how you begin thinking you only have space for two people. But as you go along in life, you  begin to discover you have more and more space for more and more people.

{three} kittens in teacups.
(no explanation needed)

{four} i have internet access to google for kittens in teacups.
+ okay. this makes me (just a little very) happy.

{five} i am a child of God.
+ this makes happy everyday, even though some days i have to purposefully remind myself that this is a reason to be happy. nothing else matters if i wasn't His child. this, this is the reason why my life is fulfilling and meaningful.

i hope this makes you remember why you smiled last week, or yesterday, or even a few seconds ago.
it's easy to forget the reasons for smiles, but i think those are the most important.


real or not real.

“You,” he said, “are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world,
and that, I believe is why you are in so much pain.”

-emilie autumn-
the asylum for wayward victorian girls

via tumblr

Please, don't stop. Don't stop being authentic and real and contagious with life to be lived. I might not know the quiet details of your life, but I know this: you are unashamed of joy and proud to smile. In that few spaces of time I saw you, your smile spoke more truth than any conversation I could have had with you. It wasn't just a smile; it was one of few genuine ones I have seen. And that blessed my soul today. You are something real, in a terribly false world. Pain is gonna come, but don't stop.

Don't you dare be afraid to stop
loving, giving, living.

Because darling, after all, what's life without these?


my (imaginary) first meeting with you,
my lovely readers

i hope this made your eyes smile today
because that, my friend, is one of the beautiful(est) smiles


eternity in one moment | it's fiction time (v.)

meeting you again that day was like eternity compressed into one moment. it was like an adrenaline rush of memories that left me breathless. you might have caught me off guard, and i've told myself over and over again not to be caught surprised. but i did. and i guess it's okay, you know. it's fine to mess up sometimes. thinking back, i wonder if i might have surprised you as well.

i know ever since then, we've changed. you've changed, just look at you. but i don't want to change. i want to still live in the past. maybe it's selfish and, worse still, maybe you think i'm selfish, but that doesn't change it. your eyes tell me to live in the now. let's just move on, you say. but do you know how hard it is for me to move on? moving on means pushing memories away, it means forgetting. and i don't want to forget. it's too much to me to forget. i want to remember every single moment forever.

you know, the idea of eternity scares me sometimes. maybe because my mind can't comprehend it. maybe it's too vast and wide and abstract for me to grasp. but i think, that day when i met you again, it was almost like eternity, in one split second.

|| eternity flies ||

found this in my old drafts. i don't know why i never posted it, but here it is now!

oh, it's chinese new year and i'm in malaysia having way too much food and sleeping too much.
whatever, judge if you will ;)
have a beautiful day xxx.